Skip to content
Jul 31 / Daniela Bryan

Confessions of a Nervous Traveler

car

When I was in high-school I got my first opportunity to travel abroad: A student exchange to America. I was terrified. It worked well, but it was a nerve wracking experience.

After school I got accepted to a university in California, 6000 miles from home, which meant a whole lot more more travel. In fact the first flight across the Atlantic didn’t go so well. The air traffic controllers had gone on strike and left me stranded in Amsterdam, and then again in Vancouver, before finally arriving in Los Angeles at 1 am on an August morning in 1981. I still remember the feeling of being lost in unfamiliar territory.

The bottom line was that, I clearly wanted to see places and experience different cultures, but I was nervous about traveling.

Years later, I found myself at times traveling to three different countries a week. Since that very first trip to the US, I have done a great deal of traveling, in fact I have traveled around the world twice, once going East, and once going West.

For those of us who do travel a great deal, we might take travel for granted. But it didn’t come easy.

To really explain how I did all of this travel, I will focus on three primary things:

How did I overcome the nerves and, then, become comfortable with and confident about traveling?

How did I learn the skills required to be a good traveler?

Why did I do it?

A few things to consider when it comes to the WHY of traveling:

Why do you want to go someplace else?

Who will it help and how will it help them?

What will it do for you to experience different locations and cultures?

How would you feel inside if you didnt ever get to travel?

In my case, I was curious about what other parts of the world looked like and what the people were like. I was fascinated that people could communicate in different languages and had different daily routines. At first I only noticed the obvious differences, such as different food and different clothes. Later, I became more aware of subtle differences in the way people think and what beliefs they hold.

When studying in California I was keenly aware of me being an ambassador from Germany to the United States. I was representing my home country and my traditions and rituals. Likewise the people I met were equally ambassadors of their home country. The people I met from Iran and Ireland, from Brazil and South Africa were fascinating role models of their upbringing.

My Dad once said to me: “Experiencing different locations and cultures will broaden your horizon.” He was right. I am fortunate to have formed a very broad set of beliefs due to the exposure I have had.

I think if I never would be able to travel again I would feel extremely claustrophobic. I don’t need to travel every day. But knowing that I can hop on my bike, in a car or train, on a plane and BE somewhere else in short order is a very freeing feeling. It keeps me stimulated and excited.

Let’s talk about the HOW I overcame the nerves. Let’s talk about three core things:

1)   How important is the trip? The more important the trip, the less nerves you will feel. In fact, if it truly matters, you have some passion about getting there. And passion goes a long way to overcome nerves. Does your trip really have the potential to create significant positive change?

2)   Visualize the Good. Visualizing the positive aspects of the trip will help tame your tiger. If you focus on everything that could go wrong, guess what, everything will go wrong. I know and trust that my luggage will get there, my connections will work, that I will get rest and meet exciting people. And the list goes on…

3)   Nervousness and Excitement are close. Nervousness and excitement are almost the same emotion. They feel very similar. So the next time you feel a bit nervous, ask yourself these questions:

What would I have to do to feel excited right now?

What am I most excited about as I prepare for the trip?

What are some of the amazing outcomes that could come out of my trip, and why am I so excited about them?

With nerves and excitement out of the way, lets talk about skills.

There are clearly way more skills to discuss than I can mention in this already very long article – you can find more in some of my other blog articles – so I will focus on a few key skills:

1)   Know thyself

2)   Destination

3)   Planning

4)   Stories

Know Thyself

Know what kind of traveler you are. Shockingly most people don’t have a clue. What do you want? What do you need to be a happy traveler? What do you value in the trips you are taking? The more clarity you have of who you are and your intention the better the trip will be – guaranteed.

Destination

Let’s not talk about business travel for now, since much of the destination and travel is preplanned and often out of your control. But if it’s up to you, give your destination some thought. I want to talk about three primary destination options:

Veg (short for vegetable) – you go to a place and use all the amenities provided

Destination in 3 days – you think you will never come back to this place again and hence you try and hit all the sights in short order regardless of how far between sights.

Experience Junky – you want to experience places and people, connect with locals and understand different customs.

Knowing what you want from your destination and communicating this to all travelers in the party will go a long ways to eliminating stress.

Planning

When I was young, I seriously disliked when my Dad wanted to plan, I wanted to be spontaneous and not decide. I wanted to go with the flow. And there is something to be said for that. However, as a nervous traveler going with the flow is a recipe for disaster. You don’t have to plan every last minute, but you need to have the basics in place, transportation, lodging, money, travel documentation.

Stories

What stories have you heard about travel and taken on as truth? What do you belief about travel and what do you need to verify if it’s in fact true? The older people get, the more they let stories get in the way of taking trips and going places, because it’s too dangerous or too treacherous. There are a million and one stories to talk you out of taking a trip. And there are a million and one stories to go on this trip. It’s your choice.

While I was terrified of traveling, I also enjoyed telling the stories of my adventures. Being a good storyteller is a great start, but it doesn’t replace the need for practice.

Practice Makes Perfect

According to Malcolm Gladwell it takes 10,000 hours to mastery. To me it’s not the destination or how many hours or days I have traveled or trips I have taken. It also doesn’t matter if I have seen every sight there is. That bucket list is for someone else. For me, it truly is about enjoying the journey. And the journey can be fascinating regardless if I ride my bike in a neighborhood I have never been to, take a road trip and experience a different countryside for several hours or days, or fly to a distant location and experience country and culture.

Lastly, travel with others. Share your stories with others in order to have an impact that goes beyond yourself. Stories and shared experiences are what memories are made of.

Who know, may be we’ll connect on one of my next trips.

Safe travels!

 

Jun 30 / Daniela Bryan

Unabashedly Listening

top of trees

Imagine what would be possible if people would unabashedly listen to each other, and to themselves? You think we are – think again.

 

When I first started coaching I thought I was a good listener. How wrong I was. Routinely, I would fill silence with my opinions and attempt to solve problems. My mind would wander when my client was talking, often about mundane things, such as ‘when will I write the speech’, or ‘who is my next client?’, or ‘what will I cook for dinner?’ Alternatively, my mind would be clouded with judgment about what I was hearing.

 

Not only was I failing to hear my client’s voice, I also failed at hearing my own voice in the conversation, not my speaking voice, but my intuitive voice. The voice that now asks a question, seemingly unrelated, but invariably going to the heart of things.

 

I have since honed my skills and become an expert at listening. Perfect? Far from it, but infinitely better. Now, I listen without my mind wandering for long stretches at a time. I have found one can train the mind just like a muscle. Learning how to play tennis, play the piano or meditate takes practice. I listen for several hours a week.

 

I listen to what’s not being said. Silence is truly golden. Often what’s not being said reveals more about the nature of the problem than what is outwardly expressed. In the corporate world this phenomenon is frequently referred to as the ‘elephant in the room.’ Good listening includes observing, identifying, verifying and empathizing. It includes reading the room, even if it’s virtual. It includes sensing if the person on the other end of the phone is uncomfortable, joyful, impatient. It includes picking up on shifting dynamics when the boss enters the room. Sometimes there is just a hunch, a feeling, a whisper ever so quiet.

 

In my early career I found myself sitting in meetings, observing and listening and not speaking up for fear of sounding foolish. Now, I listen and wonder how come no one is stating the obvious.

 

What is obvious to me?

 

As I am listening to the collective conversation of war-torn Syria, the prospect of civil war in Iraq, Russia being fearful and masking the fear with demonstration of strength, of the US being firmly in the grip of mass shootings, droughts and natural disasters, I can’t help but wonder. Don’t we need to do a whole lot more listening and less problem solving? More listening and less judgment. More listening with our collective consciousness. Unabashedly listening. Listening without being ashamed of what we are hearing. Yes, we need to take action, but not until we have listened deeply.

 

Coaching Challenge:

Set your timer for 2 minutes, wherever you are. Close your eyes and listen. What did you hear? A bird, traffic, the air conditioner, a plane flying overhead? What about your inner voice? What was it telling you?

May 29 / Daniela Bryan

To BE Free

field

The last 12 months were filled with endings for me. I focused on supporting my son during his final semester of high school, before letting him go to Ireland for his first semester in college. I said goodbye to our beloved dog, Pepper, who had provided us with sweet love for 11 years. He is missed. And I let go of my judgment of my daughter. Yes, mother-daughter relationships are complicated, or they can be. For six years I have taken her path personally for fear of being judged myself. I have come to realize that she is exactly where her path led her and where she needs to be. She is in college as well, and gaining clarity of where she wants to go with her life. My judgment – good or bad – is purely a reflection on me, not her. My children, young adults now, are starting their own lives, resulting in the closing of a chapter for me. As I let go of my kids and form new relationships with them, I realized that the home I had built nine years ago to shelter, nurture and energize my family fit the last chapter of my life perfectly, but with the closing of that chapter I have to move on. During the last four months I have been emptying 4 homes (not all my own) in two continents, remodeling 2 of them and selling my primary residence. De-cluttering and reprioritizing has been incredibly cleansing and refreshing. As I am writing, I am surrounded by boxes and preparing to move, starting a new beginning. I will have right-sized my belongings so I can focus on what I am longing for: To BE Free

 

Free of attachments, free of judgment, free of social constraints, free of obligations, free of limitations that I have put upon myself, free of beliefs of what I can or cannot do. I am free to recreate myself, explore new friendships and nurture old ones, free to say yes to myself and to this beautiful world that has so much to offer.

 

I have learned that in order for something new to enter into my life, a part of the old needs to die first. It’s scary, because the old me was quite comfortable. But the new me feels compelled and excited. I have declared 2015 my year of travel and service. What that exactly looks like, I don’t exactly know yet. And I am fine with the unknown. I do have some ideas of where to start this journey. As I move forward I hope you and I will remain in touch. Together, we can create an exciting experience for both of us either virtually or maybe even in person, wherever we will connect in the world.

May 1 / Daniela Bryan

Purpose – What’s Yours?

yours

Purpose – Whats Yours?

 

As you might know I am in favor of making meaning through storytelling. Often people start working with me when they find themselves stuck in stories they don’t want to be in and are struggling to get out.

 

Recently, I learned about a new book. I couldn’t ignore it since I read about it in the New York Times, a client mentioned it and I stumbled upon it through linked in all on the same day! The Purpose Economy by Aaron Hurst is a welcome addition to books like Tribal Leadership by Dave Logan and Doing Good by Jeffrey Kottler 

 

 

Hurst points out that millennials are not willing to settle for less. They are trading in conventional career paths to launch tech start ups, start small businesses that are rooted in local communities, or freelance their expertise. No longer are they willing to ‘just’ volunteer on the side. They want to make a difference with their career and work as well.

 

I particularly liked his approach to how to find one’s purpose:

 

  1. Who do you serve?
  2. Why do you serve them?
  3. How do you serve them?

 

Notice that meaning comes from engaging in something greater than oneself, hence the questions are centered about serving others.

 

I suspect if people where to reflect on these questions their purpose would become pointedly clear and their stories would emerge clearly. Just in case, Aaron Hurst also has a psychological assessment on his website that will guide people through this process of discovery. (http://www.imperative.com)

 

Good luck with uncovering your purpose and crafting a story around it.

Apr 1 / Daniela Bryan

6 Principles on How to Raise $25,000 in 2 Hours

Untitled

Have you ever raised $25,000 in two hours? For some of you this might seem like small change, whereas others might think it’s impossible. Regardless, the principles work for $25M just as much as for $25,000. My co-guide, Sylvia FerroNyalka, and I put 11 bankers through an experience a couple of weeks ago, which demonstrates how powerful the right combination of variables can be.

As part of an 18-month leadership development program for senior executives at a San Jose bank, we challenged the executives to maximize the funds and donations they could raise for Sacred Heart Nativity School of San Jose, a middle school for students from low income families. The  executives had previously read and discussed the book “Tribal Leadership” by USC professor Dave Logan. This book highlights how having a ‘Noble Cause’ helps a team to rally behind something that matters. Having one of the students from the school talk about her hard work and dedication to succeeding in school, was crucial for the success of the project. This allowed the executives to relate to the school in a meaningful way. Once the participants were told about the challenge and the short time frame to accomplish the task, the initial shock was obvious. One of the participants later described what she thought when she heard about the challenge: “This is an impossible task.”

What transpired in the next two hours was short of remarkable. Within 45 minutes a webpage asking for donations was live on the Bank’s main site. Reams of copy paper arrived and the donation of 6 brand new  iPads was announced. A used car and later a second one was sourced. 130 fleece shirts with the logo of the school, one for each student was secured. Money donations trickled in. Friends and family members, the 49ers, the Earthquake soccer team and even a solar energy provider to investigate long term low energy costs for the school was contacted.

 

Here are the 6 principles that led to success:

 

  1. Noble Cause

Having a noble cause to work toward made everyone work particularly hard. People’s competitive nature came through as they were attempting to do good in the world. The story of the middle school girl gave the project meaning.

 

2.  Diverse Team

We had a group of very diverse skill sets. There were experts in marketing and finance, knowledge in project management and relationship builders. Each participant brought his or her individual strengths to the project.

 

3. Diverse Network

If everyone had lived and worked in the same circles, the project wouldn’t have been nearly as successful. All participants live and work in the Bay Area, but travel in very different social circles.

 

4. Collaboration

Eleven individuals on their own wouldn’t have been able to raise the funds and donations they did. By being in the same room and focused on the same topic, this group was able to ask questions, bounce ideas off of each other and brainstorm creative ideas together. This is not to say that people can’t collaborate when not being present in the same location, but it works better when everyone is in the same place at the same time.

 

5. Time Constraint

 

Two hours can be very long for some tasks, but when you need to organize and connect with people not in the room, two hours isn’t very long. However, having a limited time frame and firm end time helped the group focus. There was no time to get distracted or sidetracked. It’s a good thing.

 

6. Focus

 

We eliminated distractions as much as we could for the group. However, when people are left to their own devices, lack of focus makes many projects fail. Eliminate distractions and be clear on the stated goal to succeed.

 

The result was very impressive. Within 2 hours almost $25,000 in goods and money was sourced for the school.

 

By the end of the 18 months, we hope to raise participants’ awareness to incorporate even more leadership principles, for example identifying leaders, planning, strategizing, decision making and delegating.

 

Who knows? If we were to conduct a similar experiment again in 18 months maybe the group would end up making one phone call and source $100,000 for a noble cause. As it is, we are at the beginning of the journey and the standards were set very high. We’ll see where the journey takes us.

Feb 27 / Daniela Bryan

Ten Commandments of Change

http://13c4.wordpress.com/2007/02/24/50-reasons-not-to-change/Right now I am finding myself in the midst of significant changes as my kids are leaving the nest and I am reinventing myself. I will write more about these changes in upcoming months, but for now I needed a blueprint to juggle all the change that I am affecting. I hope you’ll find it useful to have a broken down version.

1)  Know What YOU Want

2)  Decide

3)  Declare Your Intentions

4)  Take the First Step

5)  Feel the Resistance

6)  Hold Yourself Accountable

7)  Keep at it

8)  Breathe

9)  Enjoy the Ride

10)  Do it Again

Jan 28 / Daniela Bryan

7 Ways of Developing Yourself as a Global Leader, which you must.

airport

You think I am not talking to you? Think again.  Our lives have turned global regardless if we are dealing in business or education, healthcare or Government, even if we spend much of our time dealing with local issues.

 

Recently NPR ran a fascinating story entitled “Planet Money Makes A T-Shirt.” The story starts with how the cotton is grown and harvested in the Mississippi Delta, continues to show the yarn being spun in Bangladesh, the T-Shirt was sewn in Columbia and the design was printed in North Carolina. Hundreds of people around the world had been involved in the making of this T-Shirt. Who knew? We live in a global economy impacting all of us somehow.

 

When I went to college and studied global management at Thunderbird thirty years ago, globalization was still in its infancy. A company might send some expatriates overseas to ‘help’ the local team be successful. I was one of these expatriates myself at one point and realized really quickly that it was not for me to tell the locals how to do things. They understood their markets, their culture, their resources much better than I did. Coming from the outside I did have something valuable to bring, but it was different from what I had anticipated. Rather than coming from the outside today’s generation engages from the inside. The game has changed.

 

Thirty years ago it was unique for a 19-year-old girl to come to the US to attend college. Today this is nothing special. My daughter spent her 10th grade in Lugano, Switzerland and traveled to India in her senior year. My son also went to India and started his college experience with his first semester in Dublin, Ireland. Yes, the world has shrunk.

 

For companies to succeed today they need to have people with Global Intelligence, forget IQ and EQ. They need leaders that can adapt to the global context, understand diverse cultures, know themselves enough to not impose on others, have an insatiable interest in other cultures, are able to align others around a mission and values with integrity intact, have the ability to nurture a cross-cultural network and understand local needs while leveraging unique global strengths.

 

You might think that only large corporations need employees with these skills. Not any longer. 37Signals for example started out with 7 people in 7 different countries. •UP There, Everywhere, the global consultancy I am working with has members in 15+ countries collaborating, and we are all small business owners with high level expertise.  Size doesn’t matter, all of us are engaged globally.

 

So, what does it take to develop yourself as a global leader today?

 

1)  Live in a foreign country, or two, or three

 

I have lived and worked in 3 countries. For anyone at the beginning of their career, I would recommend to live in a number of different countries, ideally one of them being an emerging country. Life is different in a vastly different culture. The bigger the difference to the home country the more learning there is.

 

2)  Have line responsibility in an overseas business

 

Don’t just travel to a foreign country, work there. Take on responsibility for a department, a business unit, a company. The learning is priceless.

 

3)  Learn local languages and customs

 

I know much of the communication on the internet is in English. If you want to understand the mindset of the people you are dealing with it is essential to speak the local language. Much of the culture is wrapped up in the language. I am fluent in German and English and still I come across certain words that just can’t be translated with the same meaning.

 

4)   Understand your own culture and cultural biases

 

By traveling and dialoguing with people in your own country you get a better understanding of what your own culture is all about. Inevitably, you formed your own biases growing up and starting your adult life. Keep questioning what you think is true and reexamine. The more self-awareness you bring the better you can understand the other culture.

 

5)  Understand cultural differences non-judgmentally

 

You will come across different mindsets, customs, cultures. Just because they are different, doesn’t mean they are good or bad. They are simply different. Being curious about others will widen your horizon and often guide you to unique solutions to problems. Connect on a human level and observe the differences.

 

6)  Lead cross-cultural task teams

 

Working for Kodak in the 80s I led a cross-cultural team in Europe including 12 different nationalities. Without a doubt it was one of the most educational, interesting and humbling experiences in my life. Picture 12 different nationalities represented around a table. You are bound to make assumptions about who the executives are and what they believe in.

 

7)  Educate yourself in cross-cultural communications

 

Much has been written about different communication styles in different countries. The Japanese won’t say NO, the Germans like organization, the Indians are highly analytical. Cultures are blending more and more and yet the basic cultural communication traits still exist. Don’t just dabble, really study this to be effective when you hit the ground.

 

Some global corporations are now requiring of all their leadership potential to have lived and worked in at least 2 foreign countries. I think we need to make this a goal for the next generation of leaders as well. When I see where my children’s peers have lived and traveled to, I find it imperative.

 

Think local, act global is my new motto!

Dec 23 / Daniela Bryan

What I Want For You – The Leader

mountains

Everyone is a leader, correct? We tend to think of leaders as the figure ahead of an organization, a group or a movement. Nelson Mandela was a leader, Rest in Peace. Richard Branson is a leader. Leonard Bernstein was a leader.

 

What about you? Aren’t you a leader? Yes, you are. At least you are the leader of your own life.

 

“A leader is a person who has a vision, a drive and a commitment to achieve that vision, and the skills to make it happen.” according to F. John Reh.

 

Check. I think this applies to you as well.

 

Regardless if you see yourself as a leader or if you have been given a title to reflect the responsibility taken on for others, being a leader has its challenges. You are supposed to have all of the answers and yet the more you look ahead, the murkier the waters get.

 

Everyone is leaning on you to make the right decisions, take actions, know the right course. Well, it isn’t so easy.

 

I have been a life long scholar of leadership: my Dad is a former CEO, my mother was one of the first German women to get an MBA (or the equivalent) right after the war, I have worked for leaders and have been working in several leadership roles myself, and now I am privileged to work with company leaders in the for-profit and not-for-profit world in a global economy.

 

There are some universal truths about leadership and one of them is the fact that it is not easy to be a leader.

 

Recently, I came across a blessing by the Irish author and poet John O’Donohue. I found it so profoundly beautiful that I want to share it with you. It captures the essence of what I want for you – the leader:

 

For A Leader

 

May you have the grace and wisdom

To act kindly, learning

To distinguish between what is

Personal and what is not.

 

May you be hospitable to criticism.

 

May you never put yourself at the center of things.

 

May you act not from arrogance but out of service.

 

May you work on yourself,

Building up and refining the ways of your mind.

 

May those who work for you know

You see and respect them.

 

May you learn to cultivate the art of presence

In order to engage with those who meet you.

 

When someone fails or disappoints you,

May the graciousness with which you engage

Be their stairway to renewal and refinement.

 

May you treasure the gifts of the mind

Through reading and creative thinking

So that you continue as a servant of the frontier

Where the new will draw its enrichment from the old,

And you never become a functionary.

 

May you know the wisdom of deep listening,

The healing of wholesome words,

The encouragement of the appreciative gaze,

The decorum of held dignity,

The springtime edge of the bleak question.

 

May you have a mind that loves frontiers

So that you can evoke the bright fields

That lie beyond the view of the regular eye.

 

May you have good friends

To mirror your blind spots.

 

May leadership be for you

A true adventure of growth.

 

 

From the book “To Bless the Space Between Us” by John O’Donohue.

Nov 24 / Daniela Bryan

What Rip Currents and the Holidays Have in Common

currents

“ Rip currents are a source of danger for people in ocean and lake surf, dragging swimmers away from the beach. Death by drowning comes following exhaustion while fighting the current,” according to a definition from Wikipedia.

 

To me the holidays sometimes seem like fighting the current:

 

It happens every year. Like clockwork. Even if we don’t pay attention, the holiday season is almost as certain as death and taxes, at least in the Western world. A blessing and a curse, all the same, it often seems.

 

According to a study by Greenberg, Quinlan Rosner in 2006, 49% of men and 51% of women strongly agree that they feel responsibility to make sure everyone in their family is happy.

 

The result?

 

Stress, stress and more stress…

 

And herein lies the problem. Rather than focusing on one’s own happiness, the focus shifts to others.

 

But in the spirit of ‘giving’, isn’t  the focus on others what it’s all about?

 

Not so fast. As much as we want to be with family and friends and give to those who are less well off in one form or another, the shift to pleasing others causes enormous stress.   Let’s be honest, for many it’s not a shift at all. They try to please others all the time. The effect is compounded during the holidays since there is more interaction with family than during the rest of the year. The desire to please others is flawed thinking in my mind, especially, if our vessel is depleted already, psychologically, physically and emotionally. What more is there to give? What good does it do, when we recognize and acknowledge others, while feeling miserable inside? So, here is my #1 strategy for not just surviving, but actually thriving during the holidays:

 

Put Yourself First!

 

Let me repeat.

 

Put Yourself First!

 

Ask yourself what you need to not only survive but thrive?

 

Need some alone time? Great. — Time to say NO to others.

 

Need some one-on-one time with a special someone? — Time to ask.

 

Need time outdoors smelling the roses? Building a snowman? — Time to give yourself permission.

 

Need to not be under the in-laws’ roof?  — Time to get a hotel room.

 

Need work to not encroach on family time? — Time to set boundaries with the boss.

 

Need to let go of perfectionism? — Time to let go of being attached to the outcome.

 

Or how about this one:

 

Need to feel loved? — Time to love yourself first.

 

Guess what:

 

It starts with YOU! Start with yourself first and manage your resources (time and money) accordingly and you will float through the holidays with ease and meaning. Pretend you are a kayaker conserving energy by going with the current rather than against it.

 

One last tip:

 

Consider what you need to say NO to in order to say YES to yourself. It works!

 

Happy Thanksgiving!

Oct 29 / Daniela Bryan

How To Avoid Fallout From Jetting Across Time Zones – And Why It Matters

airplane

Brain Fog. Body Fatigue. Soul Perspective.

 

Jet lag sucks — or does it really?

 

I never give myself credit for being an expert at handling jet lag, but I am. For five decades (yes, admittedly), I have been dealing with the after effects of long distance travel. And unlike a pilot who never really adjusts to the time zone, I have taken on the challenge of jet lag hundreds of times (suffering at a high level, I suppose).

 

In my teens, I went from Germany to the United States totally oblivious to the rhythm of traveling across time zones. Commuting for college between Munich and Los Angeles in my early 20s taught me to respect the distance, but youth allowed me to roll with the punches (at least in my memory).

 

In my late 20s and early 30s, traveling to sometimes three countries a week while based in London was exciting and exhilarating. Jet lag, who cares? London to San Francisco for a weekend? Sure, no problem.

 

Then came travel and jet lag with young children. There is enough material in that to fill another article or two. Suffice it to say, I can still see the remnants of freshly watered plant soil smeared all over the house while Mommy and Daddy were in exhausted deep sleep shortly after the long-haul flight from SFO.

 

Kids also seemed to introduce the idea of catching colds on airplanes. Don’t get me wrong, you can catch a bug from anyone on a plane, but children seem to exponentially increase the risk and it doesn’t have to be your own kids that spread the germs.

 

In my 40s and now 50s I have learned a thing or two about jet lag, but some of the effects I still can’t change, such as being wide awake at 2 a.m. as I am writing this article. People awake at this hour without jet lag typically aren’t productive. They tend to be destructive with their minds going into overdrive. Jet lag offers me intense productivity at really odd times of day, usually when nothing and no one else can distract me.

 

But I digress.

 

I have had the privilege of traveling around the world, once east, once west, in addition to hundreds of trips across the Atlantic Ocean, the Pacific Ocean and close to the North Pole. So, yes, I have learned a thing or two about how to ease the pain. Here are my golden rules for preventing, managing and surviving jet lag:

 

1)  Failing to Plan is Planning to Fail

 

Plan for your arrival when you book your flight, regardless of whether you book yourself or you delegate this task. Know when you will have your natural low in the local time. For example, I know that I will be very sleepy early in the morning when going to Europe, but that will occur in the afternoon when I return to California. I avoid meetings or extensive driving during the REM sleep phase for safety reasons. As an executive you don’t want to argue your case before the Board of Directors during the REM sleep phase. Neither do you want a surgeon to operate on you when he just returned from a conference halfway around the world.

 

2)  Fit as a Fiddle

 

Especially busy executives tend to fall short on this. If your body is not in good health and you are not in shape, your immune system is not at its best. The fitter you are the quicker you bounce back after landing. Exercise before, during, and after flight makes time travel a lot more pleasant. We typically know how to exercise before and after, but what about during? Here are a few tips: Take the stairs rather than the elevator or the escalator. Walk around the airport rather than sit in the lounge. Stand instead of sit. Walk the aisle of the airplane when possible. Do stretching exercises, even while sitting in your seat. Ask a personal trainer at your gym for suggestions. Some people do yoga; it’s rumored that Sting does that on all flights. You can almost do a full workout while on a plane, except for cardio exercises. Use the hours upon arrival that you feel good to exercise and help your body adjust.

 

3)  Cool as a Cucumber

 

Lots has been published about our diets and how we need to focus more on eating vegetables and protein and less processed foods. Unfortunately, that is not easy in airports and airplanes even though it has gotten better in some. My # 1 rule: Eat lightly. No Duck a l’Orange before stepping on an airplane. On the contrary, eat a salad before so you won’t feel bloated in increasingly tight seats. It will help you transition with your digestion as well. Think twice about the salted snacks and the mashed potatoes or the dessert that will make you crave more salt or sugar. I often take sliced bell peppers on board.

 

When you arrive, make sure you have access to light snacks for when you wake up hungry in the middle of the night. Eating lots of vegetables and salads also helps with traveler’s constipation, a not-so-pleasant side effect of traveling across time zones. Also, depending on the local cuisine, watch what you are eating. More or less fiber than in your usual diet can have a big impact. The same goes for unusually spicy or bland food. I personally have to watch my bread and cold cut intake when going to Bavaria. Leberkaes’ und brez’n are my all-time favorites and because I can’t get them in California I tend to overindulge — at a price! The same might be the case for pasta in Italy, pommes frites in France, or shepherd’s pie in the United Kingdom.

 

4)  Liquid Lunch – Think Not

 

Avoid alcohol, especially at 30,000 feet! The alcohol affects your body much more at high elevations. Being confined to your seat for long stretches of time and being bored is no excuse. I used to love a split on my British Airways flights from London to Frankfurt. But drinking alcohol on transatlantic flights can prove to be quite challenging. Getting up after a long flight and then dragging yourself through customs is no easy task. American Airlines used to greet flights from Scandinavia with an extra allotment of wheel chairs to handle all the drunk passengers. Are you sure you want to be one of them? Also, alcohol tends to mess with your sleep rhythm, so best stay clear.

 

Caffeine is tricky too. I just spoke with an executive who flew to Barcelona and kept himself going with lots of coffee. He had a terrible time with jet lag. A cup of coffee or tea to get you over the hump is fine, but all in moderation. Otherwise, you’ll be so wired at 3 a.m. you’ll wonder why you didn’t resist for hours.

 

Water is your best friend. Airplane rides tend to dehydrate us (and alcohol tends to add to that problem). I know you can’t take water through security. But do yourself a favor and buy a bottle of water before you get on a plane. Even better bring an empty bottle and refill it in the airport and on the plane. That way you can have water when you need it, not when the flight attendants provide it. After arrival continue with keeping water with you at all times and drink frequently. Waking up in a bed at midnight, disoriented, thirsty and groggy is bad enough, but having to go on a hunt in unfamiliar territory is hard. Plenty of water also helps flush out toxins in your body. I know plenty of people who don’t want to drink a lot of water for fear of having to get up and use the facilities, but don’t buy into that story. I suspect you won’t have to get up more often than otherwise, because you are just countering dehydration at 30,000 feet.

 

5)  The Best Defense Is a Good Offense

 

Even, if you are not a fan of taking vitamins regularly, do take them when traveling across time zones. I personally take Airborne (no, they didn’t sponsor this article, although I wish) before, during and after every long haul flight to boost my immune system. It helps me fight off all the germs that are in airports and airplanes just waiting to attack me.

 

6)  The Emperor’s New Clothes

 

Think carefully what to wear on a flight. Start with the shoes. You want well broken-in, comfortable shoes that won’t leave you with blisters on the long way to the gate, that you can easily slip on and off during security checks and that will fit again after a long flight with swollen feet (exponentially brutal while pregnant, I might add). I personally always travel with slippers that I put on right after take off. You might wonder what slippers have to do with jet lag. My philosophy is the more I can relax and enjoy the flight, the easier time I will have with jet lag.

 

Moving on to clothes. You want to dress comfortably and in layers. You never know if you will be sweating or freezing on the airplane and usually you don’t have any control over the temperature whatsoever. Just recently I found myself stuck in a window seat freezing for almost eight hours. Luckily, I didn’t get sick this time, but I would like to think only because I was prepared. Always carry a scarf — men, you too.

 

Clothes also matter for jet lag. You want to be comfortable for the first few days in a new location. Super tight clothes or scratchy new outfits might not feel so good, when all your body wants is to curl up.

 

7)  Ahead of Time

 

Change your clock as soon as you get on the airplane and structure your food intake and sleep cycle according to the new location. Try not to calculate what time it is in your body. Otherwise your mind will use it as an excuse and make you feel even worse.

 

8)  Sleep Tight

 

When it’s dark out, sleep. That’s it. When it’s dark outside, close your eyes, use eye shades and ear plugs as necessary and meditate. It will lead you to much needed sleep. Even if not, it will leave you more rested. Upon arrival, try not to give into the temptation of taking a nap. An espresso can help you over the hump. Ideally, you want to sleep at night and be active during the day.

 

What if you can’t fall asleep or wake up early totally wired? Rather than fighting it, use this time to your advantage. It might be your most productive time for the first few days (hence, I am writing this article now). Avoid the temptation to be physically active or to use screens during the dark hours to keep you from being bored. A TV or computer will give you the illusion that you are supposed to be awake when you are not. Instead, read, meditate, or write on a note pad. Dump your thoughts and then turn the light off again. Even if you get up, keep the lights dimmed and engage in mellow activities.

 

9)  Worth Its Salt

 

Because your body needs to adjust to a totally new rhythm, you will be productive and creative at different times than you normally would. Use it to your advantage. For example, I am writing this article at 2 a.m. and I know that I will be unproductive and mellow at 2 p.m. today. Work with this shift. Because your body is out of sync and at odd times it can offer you a completely new perspective on life where you came from, and life where you are going. I call this the gift of jet lag. As much as I dread the strange feelings of fatigue, I marvel at my output when I am in lockstep with people on the other side of the earth. Please share your thoughts below. What did you take away from this article? What actions will you take as a result of reading it?

ERROR: 8 - CURL error: Couldn't resolve host 'danieladmin.infusionsoft.com'